>> From WXXI News.

This is Connections.

I'm Evan Dawson.

Our connection this hour was made with a family.

As we'll discuss this hour.

Family can be many things.

There's biological family.

Of course there's chosen family.

The way families are formed and how they can express themselves can also take on many forms.

And that's part of the theme of this month's issue of City Magazine, appropriately called The Family Issue.

And the team from city, the family from city is here to talk about with us this hour, and it's great to have them in the studio.

Leah Stacy, editor in chief of City magazine.

Hey.

Welcome back.

Hey, nice to see you across the table.

Hello, Patrick Hosken, arts reporter for City Magazine.

Nice to see you.

And you, Ryan Williamson, executive director of City magazine.

Director of digital products for WXXI Public Media.

Welcome.

Hi.

And hello, Flo Flo Cardella, who is going to talk to us about found family, chosen family and related themes here.

Nice to see you.

>> Nice to see you too.

>> So, Leah, take us through why family?

We're going to talk about this outstanding cover in just a second.

But before we do that, why family for March?

>> Well, we have a couple of issues every year that are sort of what we call a rotating themes.

And this one had been on the docket for a while.

I feel like a lot of our content is sort of targeted to this, maybe very wide range of 25 to 65, and we wanted to get something in that could speak to, you know, the experience of having a family in many different ways.

I think Rochester is a very family centric city.

we obviously had a little fun with the cover.

So while I would not say that the content is specifically targeted to like children, which I think some people may assume, we did try to draw in a wider demographic with this one, but also interpret the concept.

>> I want to read a little bit from your editor's letter on origin stories, your genealogy, Irish roots, and a trip to Ireland with your sister and brother in law.

You write about getting emotional when you went to an Irish history museum and reflected on how Irish immigrants left their homeland to escape the potato famine.

You write.

Now, almost three years later, I think of other families who have a dream of starting over.

A family is being split apart by a government that has forgotten their own origin stories, that people in their bloodline to came to these shores from another place and were allowed to stay and build a life of the meaning of the American dream.

In 2026, as the country approaches a 250 year milestone this July, end quote.

Tell me more about how you reflected on your own roots in that way.

And maybe that trip here for you.

>> Yeah, I mean, the trip like I referenced was three years ago, but I've just been thinking a lot about this with recent headlines and how there is really only one people native to this country.

And yet we are really pretending.

And I say we very loosely, I don't mean you and I, but the government is sort of treating other people, not sort of they are treating other people as though they don't have the same right that a lot of our ancestors were once given the right to call this place home, the right to settle here and build a new life.

And it's just been setting really heavy with me.

And so I was thinking about that, you know, family comes from ancestry.

It is rooted in the traditional sense, in the people that came before you.

And for probably everyone at this table, I feel confident saying that our families came from other countries.

If you go way back in our bloodlines.

>> Yeah, yeah, for sure.

And this is not going to be an hour on immigration.

Thank God we've talked enough about that.

But but I understand the reflection of the moment of juxtaposing some of that because, yeah, I think there are legitimate conversations about what borders should be and what immigration flows should be.

And then there's the whole separate thing of, well, this is my country, you know, as opposed to how how far back do we need to go so that your people were told that they weren't welcome?

And, you know, at some point, the answer for most of us.

So I've mentioned this on this program, but, I mean, I recently talked to my older son about the fact that, like, well, Dawson's kind of a made up name in our family, our family name is Gustafson.

It's Swedish.

My other family name is Fraunfelder.

It's very German.

And I.

>> Think you should look at a name change.

I think you should go back.

>> Go back to Evan Gustafson.

Yeah.

I mean, my great grandfather.

Axel was told, like they hated his accent and they wanted him to learn better English.

And they're like, you're not getting this job unless you promise you're gonna learn English.

You try to get rid of that accent.

And they told them, like, change your name.

Nobody likes to say it.

And they just looked across the street and they said, Dawson, that's it.

Yeah.

That's who you are now.

And that was it.

>> Yeah, we're second generation Stacy.

My grandfather changed the last name.

There you go.

I mean, how many.

>> And how many names were changed?

Yeah, because the people who were receiving the immigrants at the time were either weren't comfortable, couldn't pronounce it, didn't like it, had a prejudice against it.

It's like we forget that history.

>> We forget.

>> So I just I really appreciate that note.

and it's a, I think it's a great way to kick off the idea of family.

And we're going to go in a lot of different directions here.

But I don't know Patrick.

Do you have anything you want to add here?

Did you have a fake name that you want to reveal here on the air?

>> No.

>> But now.

Now would be my chance to introduce one in the pages of city.

Right?

My nom de plume.

That could.

>> Be my fake name.

>> Of course.

I would never say what it is so that no one would know.

>> Hoskin is what?

Let's see.

>> Well, I, from the very preliminary research, I think it comes from the same like English.

Dutch as like Osgood and and those kinds of names.

so I.

>> Think, oh.

>> That's interesting.

It's, it's just very largely like Anglo kind of amorphous.

Okay.

>> Yeah.

and Williamson is the son of William, I think.

>> I think so, yeah.

Super.

Just WASPy white, like European.

Totally.

>> and what about you?

Flo Cardella.

>> Cardella.

My dad's side of the family is from Sicily.

>> From Sicily.

Okay.

Yep.

so I just, I love thinking about roots, but it is hard to juxtapose that with the way we are talking about who deserves to be in a place.

Yeah.

So.

Anyway, great start there.

I really appreciate that.

Note from Leah.

It's the family issue in March.

Okay, let's let's lighten it up a little bit here.

Let's talk about this cover.

Whose idea was this cover for city.

And if you're watching on YouTube, you can see it if you're not watching on YouTube, you've got basically a coloring book on the cover of city.

It's blank.

It's meant to be colored.

So if you pick up city this month, you they want they want you to color it, right.

>> Do I think this was my idea?

And I apologize to Jake.

Walsh, our art director, who can't be here today to to talk about his great work.

He did this illustration, and it took him a long time.

And he was just he was just these little windows in here.

He was spending all day.

>> He said he was like Harold and the purple crayon.

That's what he referred.

>> To himself.

All the windows.

I love.

>> That he labored over every single detail in here.

And I hope you all sit down with your kids or your family.

>> Who colored yours?

>> we did this as a team for a video on our Instagram.

>> Okay, so if you're if you're watching on YouTube, you saw the blank.

Now let's take a look at Ryan's.

There.

Are there.

That's pretty good.

Yeah.

You know.

>> You gotta hold it up higher.

>> Yeah.

>> Hold it up higher.

There you go.

>> That's like that's you know, that's.

>> Like B-plus.

>> No, thanks.

>> I mean, that.

>> Was.

>> It was literally that was like several adults, like.

five adults.

>> Together.

>> Yeah.

And Katie had the great idea to do sort of like a top down, sped up color, which they're a little Easter egg in the video, which some people on Instagram call it.

but it's just it's so fun.

And then I did ask Jake to, like, do a little extra work and add the train, because I was thinking, if my nephew gets Ahold of this, he's going to want to color the train.

>> Yeah.

>> I love it.

>> Put your graffiti tags on the train.

>> Yeah, I want to.

>> Walk around Rochester.

I want to pop into a coffee shop and just see somebody's colored city.

>> Just the same.

Yeah.

>> That's what I want.

So Rochester and Finger Lakes region get your city, and I want to see it just left in public.

Like the best.

>> Yeah.

>> And we're gonna feature.

>> Yeah yeah, yeah.

>> Go ahead.

You were saying.

>> So we want people to tag us at Rock City Mag or email them to Jacob at Rock city.

And we're going to feature some of them in the April issue.

>> Well, let's talk about flows piece here.

it's flows piece is make a movement.

It's about found family.

And the first lines of your piece really struck us.

You write sometime in my mid 20s, right after the pandemic, this crazy thing happened to me.

Suddenly I didn't know how to make friends.

Tell me more about that.

>> I don't know, I feel like when you're a little kid, you're constantly just in group settings where people are like, go introduce yourself to that person.

Like, it's okay, no one knows anybody.

And as an adult, you're like, I have to be confident enough to walk up to a stranger in a group of people that seem like they know each other.

In this environment where I'm maybe not confident and say, hey, I'm Flo, nice to meet you.

I think I belong here too.

>> And so you identify six ways to create found family, define found family.

>> For me, I think found family.

I think any family really is what you make it.

It doesn't have to be people you're related to, but it's people that you know, you feel a kinship with, kind of same sort of mentality, mindset, same general heart between you that you're like, you know what, I fit in here and I feel like I can be my real self.

>> So six ways to create Found Family.

I'm going to ask you to tell us about each one of these.

I'll read down the list.

Number one, do quiet hobbies together.

>> Yeah.

>> Like what?

>> Absolutely.

My roommate and I love to crochet.

She kind of got me into it.

She's like a wizard, and I'm just trying to keep up.

But it's a fun little passive hobby that you can, you know, do something with your hands and maybe still some anxiety and kind of have a deeper conversation if, if possible, while also having something to show for it.

>> Number two, host a potluck style dinner party.

>> Yeah, absolutely.

I grew up in a house where we always had people over for like every holiday.

My mom loves to host and she would always put a lot of pressure on herself to kind of have everything be perfect.

And in my adulthood, I'm like, I don't want to do that.

I want everybody to contribute, and I want to see what my friends are good at making and and what everybody's proud of and what everybody wants to experiment with and try.

So if you invite people to bring their own dish, it's kind of just a what do you like to eat?

What do you like to do?

What do you want other people to experience sort of moment?

>> I love that one.

Now this number three is very interesting to me.

Keep admin hours.

Yeah.

What is the story here?

>> Yeah, absolutely.

Have you ever kind of just been like, I have so much to do and I don't want to do it, and I don't want to say no to opportunities that I have to hang out with people or go try new things just because I need to, like, file my taxes or, you know, like, decide what new laptop to buy or whatever.

I like to go sit with my friends in a coffee shop and say, okay, let's all be like, really productive here together in this space and like, chat and ask for advice and try new things and try new strategies.

It's kind of just like a I do better with like a body double.

Have you ever, have you ever body doubled with anybody?

Do you know what that is.

>> No.

>> Okay.

I think it's like it's anybody, anybody do that.

And new new language for everybody.

Cool I love that.

So body doubling is kind of just like there's a person and they're in the room with you and they're doing whatever they want.

And they just keep you accountable to do whatever it is that you were going to do.

So like for me, like if my roommate's sitting at the kitchen table eating dinner, I'm like, I'm going to do all the dishes, I do all the dishes, wash them dry and put them away.

And I'm like, that was easy.

But if I'm just sitting in the kitchen by myself, I'm like, I'm not doing those dishes.

This is crazy.

>> So it's like an accountability partner.

>> Almost like a little accountability buddy.

Co-working.

Yeah.

>> Yeah, yeah.

>> Let's say you got a 14 year old son and he's got reading to do.

And I'm just like, why are you get that done, please.

Eyes on book please.

Yeah.

I mean okay, so I'm here when.

>> There's somebody there.

>> All right.

Yeah.

But the admin stuff is to me that's the conflict I have is if I go to a coffee shop with people, I want to be present for them.

I don't want to be on my tech.

You know?

>> Yeah.

I think that there's this weird thing that happens where you're, like, present, but you're not, like, ignoring your present in both ways.

You're present for yourself.

You're holding yourself accountable.

But you're also like holding your friends accountable, and they're holding you accountable and vice versa.

And then you can also like still comment like the point isn't to be like nonverbal and just kind of like sit there and lock in.

You're still like, I want to have this be a social activity.

I just want to get something done while I do it.

>> All right.

So that's number three.

Number four, extend a warm welcome.

And you've got a very specific point about how to do this.

So tell us.

>> About it.

Absolutely.

My good friend Becca Cunningham has this lovely social club called Warm Welcome, which I think is a very fitting name for what it is to kind of just let people make new friends.

It's going on a walk.

It's going to go do a cold plunge, going to a sauna a cookie exchange, a cake party in the park.

She does a lot of really cool, engaging stuff.

And it's things that you might want to try on your own, but maybe don't have the friend group to get started with and gives you the opportunity to make friends, move to a new city.

It's a perfect opportunity for you.

Or if you've lived here your whole life.

>> They do this in Denmark.

>> Yeah, they do this in Denmark.

Yes.

That's kind of where she was inspired.

>> I love that idea.

Number five join or start a book club.

They still have these.

Do people still read books?

>> They do.

I do at least.

All right.

I do certainly.

I think that book clubs are definitely underrated.

Kind of.

Back to what Leah was saying.

I think that a book club kind of gives you the opportunity to look at how other people are living, whether that's a fictional reality or a in our real life reality, and kind of just chat about that and talk about that.

my favorite sort of book club is when you don't all read the same book and you just talk about a book that you're excited about and trying to get other people to talk about it, too.

But if you're all reading the same thing, that's that's good as well.

>> And finally you say, just say hello.

Yeah.

I mean, okay, simple.

But why?

>> Absolutely.

Like, how many times are you walking down the street and you're just like, everybody's in their own, in their own mind.

And then you like, stop and you smile at somebody and you just keep on your merry way.

You say like, hi, good morning.

And they smile and you smile and you're like, okay, cool.

Like, I don't know that person, but it has the opportunity to kind of evolve into something new.

And just saying hi is putting yourself out there in a way that maybe you wouldn't otherwise.

>> When I read this, I thought of a recent experience I had.

So my son and I were going into a grocery store.

I held the door for a couple of people and I always like, hold the door.

And I say, hey, you know, and both people blew right past, eyes down, like no acknowledgment.

And it's not a big deal.

It's just a door.

I mean, like, I'm not a hero, but like, no acknowledge, no human connection whatsoever.

So I just told my boy, I'm like, if anybody ever holds a door for you, look them in the eye and say thank you.

Say hello, greet people, make eye contact.

I'm amazed at how often we can pass human beings, either in the street, in a store, on a bus, and this just to me, it feels very different than when I grew up.

This is where I'm like yelling at clouds.

But it feels different and I'm sure tech has a lot to do with it.

So I really appreciated this one.

Yeah, the idea.

>> I appreciate.

>> You finding finding more human connection there.

You have to do you tell yourself to make an effort to do it?

I mean, you almost have to remind yourself to do.

>> It sometimes.

>> Yes, sometimes no.

It depends.

For my job, it's a lot of kind of like putting yourself out there.

I work at a bar.

it's a lot of, like starting conversations with strangers.

Kind of like asking, how was your day?

What are you doing?

What are you excited about?

and I think that, like, in my regular life, I kind of just, like, get laser focused sometimes and forget about, like, quiet, simple moments.

And those are oftentimes my favorite looking back of like, this was a surprise interaction.

I wasn't planning on having, but I'm glad that I kind of made myself have it.

>> Good stuff on found family photos pieces.

Make a move.

Make a movement from Flo Cardella.

Thank you very much for telling us about that.

Leah's piece a daily festival.

We're going to bring in a couple of people connected to that.

I want you to introduce them.

Leah, tell us about the story of a daily festival here.

>> Yeah.

So this is a story about it.

Centers on Sagra Italia, which just opened on Saint Paul.

But it is a sister restaurant to Tapas 177, which is 29 years old this year, which is crazy.

Yeah.

I mean, I just that's so impressive for a restaurant in a city like Rochester.

and then they also own Event 180, which is right across the street, all in Saint Paul.

And it's largely the Cavazza family and their partner, who they call Uncle Chris.

and we'll be hearing from him, I believe.

And they have invested in this block on Saint Paul when a lot of businesses have left, have closed for one reason or another, and they believe so strongly in downtown.

And I had the best time hearing from them about that.

But the cool part is that Demetrio, who was the original founder of tapas, his daughters Ava and Mia have now come into the family business and have really taken the reins at Sagra in Event 180.

And they are in their 20s and it was very inspiring to chat with them.

And you will hear more from, I believe, Ava.

>> Yeah, so we've got Ava Bliss, we've got Uncle Chris Sagra Italia is the name of the new venture here.

Sagra means festival, I think in Italian is what I'm reading here, although that is not my native tongue.

So.

>> Sagra Italia.

Yes.

>> Sagra Italia.

>> And that's in the old fifth frame, which, you know, when you heard about that closing, it was like, oh man.

it feels like it should be such a vibrant space.

Tapas is an institution.

And let's bring in Ava and Chris, who are with us.

Hello, Chris.

Hello, Ava.

>> Hello.

Hello.

How are you?

>> Great to have both of you there.

Chris is partner with Sagra Italia and Tapas 177 and Event 180.

Ava, director of events and marketing for Sagra Italia, Tapas 177 and Event 180.

So you know, Ava, you just heard Leah talking a little bit about the family aspect of all of this 29 years for Tapas in November.

Incredible here.

Does it feel like a big family to you?

>> Yeah.

So like Leah mentioned Chris has been a part of tapas for 25 years now, and we think of him as our uncle.

really grew up with him because I've been at tapas since I was very little, and we'd run the park at festivals and now I'm more involved in management for both Event 180 and Sagra.

but really, my family has been super involved cousins, my mom, we're all there all the time, and we just really believe in all three of these businesses.

>> Chris, do you feel like family?

>> They certainly make me feel like family.

Yes, absolutely.

>> And so if listeners haven't been down in this area in a while, again, part of why we do this is, you know, we don't do ads for businesses.

We're talking about trends and, and how we live.

And parts of neighborhoods in the city sort of ebb and flow over time.

This was one over time, you know, when Fifth Frame opened, I remember being in there talking to Wade and talking to the team there going like, this is gonna be this neighborhood is primed for this.

And I never quite can put a finger on what works and what doesn't.

But tapas has been great there.

So can I ask both Chris and Ava?

You know, when you think about tapas, almost 30 years, but then other businesses have come and gone.

So what does it take for a place, a neighborhood, to find a vibe and a success?

And, you know, are you surprised at what you've seen?

And take me kind of through where your vision is there, given all the stuff that's happened over three decades?

I'll start with Chris.

>> Okay.

yeah.

So you're right.

Tapas has been around for what seems like forever.

30 years.

That's a long time.

and basically, I feel like there's a commitment that we had when it was open and we're running it, and we own the building.

We're not.

We're certainly not moving the location.

And it just made sense for us to do our part to expand and, and keep this area lively and, you know, offer some good services to to the city.

>> Eva, tell me more about that, too.

>> Yes.

So being downtown, you know, it's can be tough with certain aspects like parking and you know, there's not always a huge crowd that wants to come downtown every weekend, but we feel like it's starting to kind of build back up again.

we see a lot of new apartment buildings and offices down here, and we're just really excited to see that growth.

And we see new faces at top us.

And now with Sagra and Event 180, we feel like we're seeing even more people that we hadn't seen previously that are coming from different areas of the city, which we're really excited about.

>> And I'm reading that you plan to have sidewalk.

I like the idea of European sidewalk seating, not just sidewalk seating, but kind of that that European feel, you know we need more European sidewalks.

>> Yes.

Don't we?

I was.

>> Stoked when they said that.

Like, I will be there.

Let me know what day it's happening.

>> I'll be there.

>> Ava.

Chris, do you want to start with this one here?

So what's the vision?

Especially in the warm months.

We're hitting 70 degrees on Saturday.

We're looking ahead.

So what's it look like, Chris?

>> Yeah, yeah.

I can't believe that.

Actually, I, I texted Ava yesterday.

I was like, did you see the forecast for this week?

Because because I was like, we're like in the process of like looking for tables and chairs for outside.

And and I'm like, oh my gosh, do I need to like make a trip somewhere and like pick up tables for this weekend.

But but yeah.

No, we have like at tapas, we have a patio at the back downstairs like it's all murals and, you know, behind us over there.

And then we do have a small sidewalk.

Patio, I guess you'd call it in the front of tapas, but.

Event 180.

I'm sorry.

Excuse me.

Sagra just has so much space there that we want to just fill it up with tables.

It's a neighborhood spot.

We want people to kind of, like, come down from their apartment or from there, take a break from one of the offices around here and just come down on a beautiful spring, summer afternoon and sit down, have a coffee and espresso, a glass of wine, something like that.

I just think it fits with the whole concept.

>> And then you want to add there.

Ava.

>> yeah.

So, Sagra is different from tapas in that, you know, we're open for lunch as well.

Tapas is just a dinner place.

And, you know, more late night.

And so we're excited to have that patio seating or outdoor sidewalk seating available during these spring and summer months when people can come out, you know, if they're working downtown for lunch and stop by and you know, it's counter-service there's no reservations.

It's very casual.

So if they wanted to stop in with, you know, a small group of people grab some sandwiches, like Chris said, like coffee.

we also have the full bar.

So if you wanted to grab a mimosa during the middle of the day, that's available too.

So.

>> Yeah.

>> So yeah, we're just excited that that can be somewhere else that people can come during the day downtown that they might not have had before now.

>> So, Leah Stacy, I think you and I have talked, I think tapas has come up in past shows when we've talked about where can you actually go out and stay out late ever since the pandemic.

Rochester is like an early closing city.

And, you know, tapas was like on the list of like I think I think you can still get a late a late bite or drink there pretty well.

But now on the flip side, where can you get lunch?

This is not a great lunch city.

I mean, that's also been affected by the pandemic.

We talked about that last hour, but here we are with another lunch option.

So I want more lunch options all over the city.

I love this idea.

and before we let our guests go, I've got to read one more from from Leah's piece here because you go back with the partnership that that Uncle Chris has with Demetrio, and Chris could have followed to a tropical location, could have ended up outside of Rochester, chose Rochester.

Talk about chosen family, chosen city.

Chris could have been elsewhere here.

And Leah, this is what you write about.

Kristen, Demetrio on their partnership, you said, observing Demetrio and Chris for any amount of time is like watching Richard Gere and Nathan Lane run a restaurant.

Leah, who is Richard Gere and who is Nathan Lane?

>> I'm glad Chris is laughing at this because I was like this.

This is in my head, but I don't know if it's going to translate.

so they're both actors, but.

>> It took me a minute.

It took me a minute.

>> Okay, okay.

>> And, you know, I'm fine with like, people googling this too, because I think they're like actors that maybe are generation or like the generation even ahead of us would know better than probably flows.

Generation flows.

Looking at me kind of.

>> Like.

>> Oh, pretty woman, come on.

>> Yes, Nathan.

>> Thank you, thank you.

>> Do you know Nathan Lane?

>> No, no.

Birdcage.

His most famous role.

Yes, yes.

>> Hunt.

Of course.

But yeah.

>> Go on.

Only murders in the building most.

>> Recently.

>> Anyway.

>> We're derailing here.

I'm so sorry.

>> We are.

>> But I just.

It was not only the the conversations I was having.

It was like the energy where it's just they, you know, that saying, like, opposites attract.

But this is an example of that happening in the best way.

You know, there's a lot of business partnerships that I see all around the city, but you when you have people who just compliment each other in the best way.

And also I watched the two of them as I was talking to them because we were kind of all in the space at the same time.

Everyone, everyone was being respectful of letting other people kind of have their their quotes and their say, and it was very fluid and I just was so impressed with the interaction that I witnessed.

>> Well, I love that that piece there.

And I'm sure, I'm sure Chris loves it too, right?

>> Yes, yes I do.

It's a 100%.

>> Chris and Ava, good luck to you.

Thanks for joining us.

And again, this is it's going to be so interesting to see this, this slice of the city that has this chance to become more vibrant, not just because of any one place, but special place.

Good luck.

Let's talk soon, guys.

>> Thank you so much.

>> Very much.

>> So a lot of listeners know tapas, but now Sagra Italia Event 180 a lot happening there.

And we'll see.

>> I we got to shout out Abby's photos.

>> Too because oh my gosh.

>> As always, like I just want to leave this chair right now and go eat the food.

We actually didn't have time to eat anything while we were there.

Every seat was full and we were like, oh my God, we gotta come back.

It looked so good.

>> Yeah.

>> The visuals.

>> Great job.

Yeah.

>> On that.

>> Yeah.

>> She always crushes it.

And then she came in with an idea for that portrait of them too, which I think just translated so well.

>> City magazine, the March edition.

The team from cities here will come right back with them on Connections.

I'm Evan Dawson Wednesday on the next Connections in the first.

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Talk to you Wednesday.

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>> This is Connections.

I'm Evan Dawson, as always, you can pick up physical copies of city, and you've got a beautiful chance to color the cover.

if you just joined us here, it's The Family Issue for March, but Ryan, where else do you want people to find city if they can't find the physical copy?

>> Rock city, Macomb.

Piece of cake.

You can read it in kind of physical, digital form, if that makes sense.

And you can flip through the pages on your screen and follow us at Rock City Mag on all your socials.

Lots of extra good content there.

>> We're not even going to be able to.

We never do.

We can never get through the whole magazine in an hour here, but that's okay.

And we're we're going to bring in Meili Shepard here, contributor to City Magazine, who wrote a piece called Chosen Family.

Hello.

>> Hi, there.

Thank you for having me.

>> Great to have you here.

So this is about foster care and adoption, and I want to first just ask you in general here, what put this on the radar for you.

And then we're going to kind of talk about some of the people you profiled.

But but why this?

Why now?

>> For sure.

So for me, this is a relatively personal matter.

I myself was an international adoptee.

I was adopted from China when I was about one years old.

So for me, family may not be the most traditional sense.

My family is my adopted parents, and for them and for my adopted siblings, my adopted family, that this is the only really sense of family that I have.

And for, for me at least, my family.

And through that, through adoption is is like a it's as natural as any other family.

So I kind of wanted to highlight these families that are created through nontraditional ways and just show that they really fit into this definition of family.

>> Do you feel like your own life story gets downgraded because you're adopted?

Or people assume that there's less family connection there?

>> I think it definitely has.

I know growing up, people, especially children, have asked like, oh, do you know your real family?

How like and stuff.

>> Like that.

>> You they.

>> Use the phrase.

>> Real family.

Yes.

And for me, my adoptive family, that is my real family.

I have no connection to my biological parents, or I don't even know who they are.

So I kind of wanted to show that these families that are created through adoption of foster care, foster care, they're just as real as any other family.

And I really just wanted to highlight their stories and their unique journey to coming to become such a family.

>> Do you stop people if someone says, well, do you know your real family?

Do you stop them and say that phrase is not the right phrase?

Or do you kind of just let it bounce off?

>> You?

>> No, I do correct them.

I say yes, like my parents as I see them, my adoptive parents, they are my real parents and I love them just as much as maybe any other biological parents would love their child.

And they love me just as much as any parents love their natural biological child.

>> So tell us a little bit about Alicia and Josh, who you profiled here.

>> Sure.

>> So Alicia and Josh Daugherty, they're a family from Pittsford, New York, formerly.

they are both special education teachers.

Josh still works as a special education teacher, and Alicia is currently a stay at home mom.

They have adopted and they have adopted six out of their 11 children.

the other five come are biological, biological.

But they kind of became a family through this unique process of fostering and then adopting and really opening up their family to these children that are in need.

>> Yeah.

And I'm also reading, if you don't mind, I want to read a little bit from your story here, and I want you to set us up with another family.

You profiled Gerald and Charles.

Tell us about them.

And then we're going to talk about I think it's timid.

>> Yes.

>> Timid 12 year old.

But tell us about Gerald and Charles here.

>> Sure.

So Gerald and Charles are they're a couple based in Rochester, New York.

They never had any biological children of their own, and they really wanted to extend their family.

I think a quote that they said was they had like a lot of time and a lot of love.

So therefore they really wanted to welcome in a child into their home.

They knew that there was a tremendous need for foster families, and they really just wanted to expand their love and their care to other people who may be in need.

>> So this 12 year old who has to, you know, has been through probably a lot in life.

The quote from timid here, he says it was a little scary and sad.

I was expecting Gerald and Charles to be unkind to me, but they were very loving and supportive, and I started to really like them.

And you write that he stayed with with them for over two years, and at that point it was as if he was already part of the family.

The adoption became official in December of 2024.

And to me, it says, in a sense, I, I feel like God sort of wanted us together.

I just feel like we were meant to be a family.

first of all, that's beautiful.

But it's also heartbreaking to hear that this almost teenager has been through so much in life that the assumption is, this is going to be bad, this is going to be awful.

Clearly, that's what he'd been through.

And I'm so grateful.

In your story, we find out, well, now he gets a happy ending.

But boy, that is that's tough to hear.

The lack of love that he felt at that going up to that point.

>> Yeah.

For sure.

to Meade shared that in his his some prior foster homes.

He experienced a lot of neglect.

Sometimes some of these foster parents abused him, hit him.

And that's just really sad to know some of these children just grow up in households where they can feel safe and they can't feel feel welcome to grow and feel supported and loved.

So I think for him coming into Charles and Gerald's care really seemed like a blessing to him.

And it was very natural.

They said they they said that the process of them transitioning from being complete strangers to eventually becoming a family was very natural.

And it was very quick because to me realized how much love and care was in this household and how much they genuinely wanted to see him thrive and wanted to help him get to a place where he can feel loved and supported and reciprocate this love.

>> Somebody in the future is going to ask to meet, you know, who are your real parents, and he's going to point to them.

>> Yeah.

>> Just the way you have.

And it's going to be, I think, a perfect lesson for us.

So I'll wrap up this here.

The Dohertys do a lot to advocate for adoption from child care, from foster care, as you mentioned.

And I know foster care as you just mentioned, with to meet his previous experiences had been varied.

They hadn't all they're not all positive.

So not it's not a perfect system.

But I know the Doherty's are passionate about adoption from foster care.

do you do you get the sense that people just need more education on the subject, that we're sort of still maybe not fully educated as a society as to what foster care is or what the opportunities are?

>> Yes, for sure.

I think that there is a lot of maybe bad rep going around about foster care and children coming from foster care, foster care.

But in reality, these kids really just need a stable house and just people who really need to, like, really want to look out, look out for them and to care for them.

And I think that having more information about these positive outcomes and these positive stories of how people become families through these resources will really help advocate for foster care and the process of adoption and just show this is really just another natural way that people become families.

>> Maly's piece is chosen family in city, perfectly appropriate and The Family Issue thanks for sharing that with us.

>> Thank you for having me.

>> That's a.

>> Great story.

>> Letting me share.

this wonderful story.

>> That's awesome.

really, really great stuff here.

sometimes, Leah, you gotta read quotes like that that, that hit your desk and it's got to just kind of be a gut punch.

But in.

>> In the.

>> Best way.

>> In the.

>> Best way.

Yeah.

I mean.

>> It's.

>> Tough, but it's it's beautiful.

>> And I also I got a shout out mainly because she started as an intern here and came, started coming to the city meetings and really wanted to do work for us.

And now she's one of our best freelancers.

>> There you go.

>> Thank you.

Always happy to have her in the pages.

>> Well, we were going.

>> To turn to a couple people who are behind part of Patrick Hoskins piece, The Making of Magic Art.

They're not available right at the moment.

But you are.

>> I am here.

>> Turns out you're right there.

>> I'm so here.

>> So.

So.

>> Tell us about the making of magic art.

Patrick Hosken.

>> So Magic Dragon magazine is a and I, I'll just go.

There you go.

>> If you're watching on YouTube, you can see.

>> It there.

And this, by the way, is the not to bring in another magazine to the city magazine issue or episode, but so Magic Dragon this is the winter 2026 issue, which just came out.

it's a children's literary and arts magazine, which I think is great.

And this is actually something that has been on our radar for a little bit.

We've talked about this wanting to kind of give them some shine, and The Family Issue seemed like a good place to do it because it is produced here in Rochester.

it is run by Patricia Roche, who is the editor, and Joanne Andrews, who's the art director.

And I mean, the magazine itself is made physically made, or I should say digitally, but made in Joanne's home in Pittsford her home studio there and so city art director Jake Walsh and myself went to meet with Patricia and Joanne, which was very cool because it was like editorial person and art director going to me, editorial person and art director from a magazine to another.

and we just had a lot of fun hearing about what a children's literary magazine is and does and kind of what that scope is, because I think the first question I had was like, well, how do you tell a child like this poem that you submitted is not going to make it in the magazine.

Right?

And and talking to Patricia specifically, but her and Joanne too, I learned the grace that they have.

And specifically Patricia actually shared with me a very sweet and very very detailed email that she sent, basically declining someone's work for the magazine on the grounds that while it was wonderfully done, it was like this piece there was this poem about, like fighting with your siblings.

And it was it was fairly dark and essentially her feedback was, this is really this is a lovely it's very well written.

It's very, you know, it's very gripping.

we just think that it's not it's you should try for, like, a magazine that is aimed at children a little bit older, because usually they get caps.

About 12 years old for Magic Dragon.

But so I love hearing about that.

And I loved hearing about the partnerships that they've formed with local schools in RCSD, as well as a lot of the towns in the region, but also, schools all over the country by which they source a lot of the artwork.

and then they're kind of along those lines.

There are prompts in each issue for creating artwork at home as well as for writing.

So, and, you know, we're a magazine.

We love to shout out other magazines, too, because we're we're hanging in there.

>> I mean, I love hearing that other magazines are are hanging in there and especially a children's literary magazine, which we've got Patricia and Joanne on the line with us now.

And I just want to ask them, first of all, hello, Patricia, editor of Magic Dragon.

Nice to have you.

>> Hello.

>> Hello, Joanne, art director of Magic Dragon.

Nice to have you.

>> Hello.

Thank you.

>> Yeah, in a sense, when you read the words children's literary magazine, it feels like it might be 1987.

And I'm really glad.

Patricia, I'll start with you.

That you can still do it.

But is it harder?

Do you feel like, you know, kids in general are less interested or gravitate less toward it?

Or do you think it can still be just as powerful?

>> Well, all I know is that all the children that we have contact with, either who are sending us writing or art, or after they have been published in the magazine are just very enthusiastic about the whole idea.

So they're already interested in writing and they're already interested in in being artists.

and it's just, it's so delightful when you look at it.

It's filled with art and poems and stories, and the kids and the parents, and everybody loves it.

So I guess that doesn't answer the question, but that's kind of the way it is.

>> No, I Joanne, do you want to add to that?

>> no.

Again, I would just add to the excitement that the kids have because I've had kids years later, even say when they happen to see the magazine if I'm, you know, have something with it, you know, in my hand.

And they're like, oh my gosh, I was in that magazine, you know, ten years ago.

But I still remember it, you know?

So it definitely leaves a lasting impression with them.

>> And I hate to do this because, you know, the team here is going to laugh because every conversation about art turns into me asking about A.I.

But I saw something really pertinent here.

I saw something really.

I saw a really interesting online argument among two artists who one was making the argument, an artist educator that kids now are being taught still to draw.

They have art classes.

They have writing classes.

A.I.

can do it better.

That's a waste of time.

They should be taught other skills because they're going to lose to A.I.

It's going to be a waste of resources and time.

And the other artist was saying, this is what's going to keep us human in the future.

If we outsource everything to programs that are not human, we're not going to grow up with number one skills to do it.

But number two, a sense of what it means to be human and what makes kids more human than the way they express themselves.

Whether it's a poem about siblings, as Patrick talked about, even one that might not make your magazine.

But Patricia, I hope you kids keep doing it.

I mean, I remember being a ten year old and, you know, submitting stuff to publications that were like a dream if that ever got in.

I never got in.

But I loved the process of trying, so I you worried about the future in that way?

Patricia?

>> Well, of course, but I think that we what we're doing is we're really trying to support that idea of being human, creating things from human beings instead of from from something mechanical.

And we our whole, our whole culture is asking us to be observers and not participants, you know, and we're waiting for something to happen when we push a button or we're told how to get something to, to work the way we want it.

And what we're trying to do is to have children go into their heads and their hearts and understand and know that they can make something from what's inside of them.

And and it can be recognized and appreciated by other people.

>> Joanne, here's what what artist Spencer Klavan says about all of this.

He says you could hardly do a worse disservice to a young person right now than to empty out the contents of their soul and strip them of the mental armor that only a rigorous literary and arts education can provide, and all in the name of some gullible claptrap about humanity and tech that wouldn't stand up to five minute scrutiny if the people peddling it and swelling it down had ever read a single thing worth reading.

We had all better snap out of this cookery right the heck now.

Or were cooked.

That's that's Spencer.

What do you think, Joanne?

Well.

>> Wow.

That's pretty emotional.

But I'm along with Pat was saying, I think you need the arts.

I mean, we, you know, like I teach, I taught for 20 plus years.

You.

I don't expect all of these children that I taught to be artists, but it teaches them a skill to problem solve, how to creatively problem solve any situation.

And that can be used in anything in their life.

And so, yeah, people can say, oh, drawing is is worthless and sit down with a pencil and stuff, but you don't realize that that's like the first step to solving a problem and how to work through it and visually see it and say, okay, what about this?

What about this?

And it's plus the fact it's just kind of nice to have something on paper at the end of the day, after the whole your whole process.

So whether you hang it up on your refrigerator or not or frame it, it's and of course, I have a I'm an artist.

So of course I'm going to say I'm, you know, love doing that part of it.

But yeah, you definitely leave it.

We need it.

We need it for our creative souls.

>> Well, before I let them go here, Patrick's piece has some great detail, as always.

And why the name Magic Dragon?

Patricia said I wanted Magic Dragon because I imagined picking up the phone and saying, this is the Magic Dragon.

May I help you?

I want what ten year old doesn't want that call?

Still Patrick Hosken.

Come on, that's true.

>> And also, and this is why the the lead photo of the piece is a great photo of the life size Magic Dragon of that gives the magazine its name.

That is in Joann's basement.

So I was very lucky to those not only get that story, but also see the dragon in the flesh.

>> And if you're on YouTube, you're watching that right now.

They rely on subscriptions and donations.

They don't have ads.

So we'll close with this.

Pat, what's the what's the future for you here?

>> Oh, beautiful.

I know for sure.

we're we have some art camps and some classes and some programs, and we're just we're going to hope for the best from everybody.

>> Joanne, you want to add to that.

>> And always more magazines.

So always keep submitting stuff.

whether it's writing or art, we'd love to see what people what they're doing creatively, what kids are doing creatively.

>> What a what a treat it was to hear this story that I knew nothing about.

I mean, city does that every month, but this is a great example of the things happening in our community.

Pat and Joanne, congratulations to you guys.

Thank you very much for taking the time for the program today.

Thank you.

The editor and art director of Magic Dragon.

You've got some kids who are going to grow up and maybe submit.

>> Absolutely.

Who knows?

And honestly, like I would I would absolutely have been one of those kids who would have been thrilled to get any piece in just the the very cool feeling of, you know, seeing not only did I do this work, but look, they reprinted on this glossy paper and it's in a book next to, you know, all the other very talented work, too.

And that was also something that I talked to.

someone an art teacher in the community who has been submitting a lot of the work to the magazine throughout the years.

And she talked about, like, the gallery style presentation of the book and even just having kids see that, like, open up and just be like, oh, here's art and art, and it's all over.

And it's like, kind of, she didn't say this.

I'm sort of editorializing, but it's kind of like the anti scroll.

And I really liked that.

You know, it's like here's just a way it's like doing a gallery wall or something.

It's not just a constant feed of stuff.

It's like these two pieces are talking to each other or whatever that case may be.

I think that's very underrated to see artwork presented that way in this day and age.

>> Love it.

Well done.

The piece is the making of magic art and boy, we're down to our last four minutes or so.

Ryan, what didn't we cover that we should have covered here?

>> I really like and and this piece that Pat wrote about the family musicians resonated with me because I'm a I'm a family musician.

I used to play in a band with my brother where I play drums, and he played guitar, and we connected with that.

So it's good to see other musicians connecting and brothers connecting through music.

that piece is called Heart and Soul.

>> All right.

You got about 40s to tell that story.

>> Well, and this maybe was wish fulfillment because I, my brother, does not play an instrument.

But I wanted us to be in a band so bad.

So you lived my dream?

Yeah.

it is a piece that.

Yes, it highlights Matt and Chris O'Brien, who originally started the band Giant Panda Guerilla Dub Squad.

now Chris continues to play in Matt's band is called Flying Object, which Chris also plays in, but they talked a lot about making music together over the years, and it also highlights Juliana Athayde and Erik Bayer, who are the co-artistic directors for the society for Chamber Music in Rochester.

They also play in the RPO and they're married.

So two different sort of family artistic relationships there in the way that that influences the art they make.

>> I love that I once in a while I can sit down with my older brother.

My twin brother is a phenomenal musician, quit school as an architect to go chase musical dreams for a number of years, was on the road, did really, really well.

I noticed how many how easy it was to get a date for him, so I picked up a guitar when I was in college.

and he never let me play music with him because I was never as good as him.

But my band was allowed to open for his band.

That was like the it was like his way of like relegating.

>> His different story.

>> But these days, yeah, that is, but these days it's fun to sit down with family and still play, still jam together.

Right?

>> we try to do it a little bit remotely.

He's in Baltimore and I'm up here.

But yeah, still jamming.

>> Good stuff.

Pat.

And what else did we miss here?

Leah Stacy.

>> I just I want to shout out Berto's photos throughout the issue.

He did a lot of shooting for this one.

Jake as well.

The two of them, I think, picked up a camera.

Maybe more for this issue than some of the other issues this year.

and I just, I love to see their photography in these in these pieces.

and, you know, got to speak up for them since they're not here.

But there are some really beautiful portraits throughout this issue.

And just.

Yeah, the team really crushed it.

As always.

>> We're a family.

>> So, yeah, I was I was leafing through the pages.

I was like, I love this issue.

>> Yeah, I want to kind of close.

It's funny, Patrick said that I want to close with this idea of work family because it was probably five years ago.

I was talking to a friend who was looking, was applying for a job, and people were like, this is like a family here.

And he and he said, it shouldn't work, should be work, work shouldn't be family.

Your family should be family.

Yeah.

And I get that too, because I get the idea that sometimes they try to sell you the schlocky idea that, like, well, this is a family here, so, you know, don't ask for a raise.

Your family, you know?

Come on.

It's like everybody's for everybody here.

and that can be used that way.

But at the same time, when it does feel like a family to me, XXY does feel like an extended family to me.

>> In the healthy ways.

>> In the healthy ways.

Yeah, in the healthy ways.

So I think there's a healthy kind of work, family and a not as healthy.

And I hope that most people feel the healthy version of that.

If work feels like a family at all to you.

Yeah.

Sometimes dysfunctional.

>> Not just a trauma bond.

Yeah.

>> Sometimes dysfunctional.

>> Yeah.

We work in media, Evan.

I just want to.

Yeah, I just want to throw that out there.

Yeah, absolutely.

>> And before we go, anything social, anything fun coming up for you guys here.

>> We will have a city social in April to celebrate that issue, which we're working on right now.

The theme of that one is growth.

and so, yeah, watch our social media.

But also when that issue prints actually socials kind of that day, it'll be April 2nd.

Save the date, more details, more details coming soon.

>> What did you say there?

>> Right.

Look at look at our social.

>> Media.

>> To find out more.

>> Information in our newsletters.

We always put it in there too.

So if you haven't signed up for our newsletters, you can do that right on our website.

our calendar of events is also a great resource on there.

Rock city mag.

Com and all of our social is at Rock city Mag.

So we're out there.

>> From the editor's note all the way through.

Really interesting look at family in a lot of different ways.

Thank you team.

Really really good stuff from city magazine online and still physically in print.

Get yours in color.

It color that cover.

I love that idea.

>> And share it with us.

>> Share it, share it with the city team.

Thanks everybody.

Thanks for being here.

That's the team from City magazine, from all of us at Connections.

Thanks for watching.

Thanks for listening.

On whatever platform you find us on.

Thank you.

We're back with you tomorrow on member supported public media.

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